Maggie is getting possessive again.
A reminder to those who pay attention to me: it is the reality of what she gets away with in her world. In my world, her "authority" means nothing. Right now I am a separatist of her cruelty to be sadistic of things that are known to bother me: her calling the shots over me and numbers of relationships, her demand to be my boss, her demand that I should have a boss.
Ben Roethlisberger, you still look like an angel. I must have not caught on to your wolf yet if you are one.
Anyway, some things are more obvious than others. I liked Houston Humphries as a person in high school. I can't say he is my best friend but he deserves to hear from me in some way. First off, I could be guessing wrong and he could see his Kim connection in someone else. I'm made to believe in this instance that I am connected to her. Houston, I see you more as a friend. I am not interested in your pursuits of wanting to live like a high schooler the rest of my life as you are. I remember that brief myspace message. I am anorexic to the engagement and relationship.
Depending on some obviousness and how some guys will come and go, I will make decisions of how I will respond during the times that men show up in my life. Adam Corolla. Could be self representing, have some shares, or I should remain hooked and believe he is representing the same 1 person. What a cruel world with how some games can go. I have the official label of being bipolar and as much as I have the potential to hate the label and stigma of being delusional, when it comes from me to say others bring it on themselves or no different in terms of delusion.............. Life can get ugly, violent, at such greater risk when some games are played the way they are played.
If he represents himself, I think he is attractive but I have no strong personal connections or personal story of him. I am uncertain to who and how many men he could have shares with.
There really are a number of thoughts that I keep private to myself.
Wolfies, you're making me give you some cheese: A woman's heart is like the ocean.
I can be complex. There may be things about me that some people will never know. It has been acknowledged by another that some things are sacred.....
While I'm not trying to live to be a tool of religion, I do value the thought of sacredness, shared secrets, unshared secrets, guarding one's heart.
People should always have free choice and free will what they want to do with their heart and how they want to share it. Some systems would say the heart is entirely based on sexuality. While I believe in love making, sensuality, sexuality, I think the common law should continue to be acknowledged: love and sex are not the same thing.
In my own personal way, I can own up as a woman that I believe women as a whole have a harder time in dealing with complications of sex and love than men, but men are still have the potential of being vulnerable whether they choose to guard themselves or not.
I have been observing some reactions lately and while I have not completely seen the movie or book "Wicked," I get the gist of issues of cattiness and female dominance.
It is such an obstacle for a woman to say what I said in the previous paragraph: "I can own up as a woman that I believe women as a whole have a harder time in dealing with complications of sex and love than men" Because there are so many other women who are ready and waiting for the right moment to pounce in competition to express their dominance, superiority, and authority over the woman to say they deserve to have the man she has because they are supposedly more mature and stable than the other.
I really am fed up with some female competitions and victimization games. Sickingly fed up.
I accept myself for who I am. When I reach certain points or certain limits, I can accept that without feeling I am a loser although I may look like I loser in some people's eyes.
I am in favor of organic food (being who I naturally am). At the same exact time, I am in favor of free will and free choice.
Some people would rather lie.
I am eventually going to watch all of the seasons of Mad Men. I already have a hunch that I hate January Jones and clues of who may be pigs of credit with copper "honesty" and "integrity."
Because of financial class issues, there will always be complications in shot calling. I have been adapting and adjusting and discovering some things for a period of time now. I remain nobody's slave even though I feel so choked sometimes by demands of others.
So wolfies, the only thing I can say to you is, that you may be able to win in some battles over me or for me. I contemplate loyalty all of the time. You will most likely never win the entire war. My heart is like an ocean. You may or may not get some lust I have over some predators. You may or may not get when I genuinly feel like I am getting raped. I complain a lot about my catty fame, but I think of all things said about me and all of the labels, I am grateful for the movie "Salt."
Who knows, maybe one day there will be a time where I will say for myself and be known to be such an openly loving person. Maybe I will continue on with varieties of games and burnings with some periods of loneliness or have shared honest, intimate moments.
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