thoughts

I had to keep the baby blog separate. I just might look back and read all of my blogs one day. I already hate that I have so many ideas crammed into one blog sometimes, but that is just how I do it......
I am ok. I am ok.
I think someone might have been making a pass at me earlier. Right now there are just 2 main hunches, but I really don't know which guy I should be paranoid with. I can tell I'm in several stockholms right now. It is quiet and I am supposed to be the paranoid person that I am. I just don't know what it really is that I need to pick up on. Sometimes, I think there is more to it than just a couple minutes of company. I don't know what to say right now in regards to the stockholms. I'm just going to stay quiet with it.

As for other thoughts.... I was very surprised when I learned that I am getting a significant tax refund. It still isn't a whole lot of money, but in this brokeness that I've been living in, it is a good chunk of money for now. I could use a little relief. I don't have to spend one of my savings bonds now or yet. Yay for me. It is another good thing besides having knit some of the baby attire.
I was grateful for the charity of the free tax service. I could already tell I was somehow being stared at in the matrix and some continued things of obsessions over me. I just ignored it and did what I was there to do: get my taxes filed. People overassume and read into everything all of the time, but I hate that I got paranoid over a simple remark of: "thank you for your free services." There really are a lot of places that would reference themself as a service. I guess I'm just so used to being around stalkers who constantly have their mind in the gutter and sometimes say their own assumptions out loud. I'm not going to be too desperate about it. It was nice of the free tax service but it wasn't nice to know I was being stared at and even obsessed over in an indirect and blinded way.
I think I have my mind officially made up though to join a local marathon team. I'll probably also try to save a chunck of that money to invest in taking a vacation. I havn't been on vacation in years. YEARS. I don't know if I want to save for a larger one when Mitzia is around 4 or 5 or if I want to give myself some kind of break now. I really need to get away. I've listened to Lenny Kravitz song enough times to be ready for a getaway at any time.

I think there is some other stockholmed light comedy going on now with several people which is something like "The Secret Police." hmph. It could give some answers but I don't think it is going to explain anything. Maybe some kind of mental vacation or just joking and messing around because people are bored and looking for something to do. Sock puppets. God, I have been reminded of an earlier blinded stockholm. While I have some slight embarassment over my isolated goofiness; I'm still mad to know that someone was possessively watching me and even wants to intentionally further ridicule and embarass me. yada yada yada

I don't have much else to say right now. Too many aches. I'm not going to talk about all of my health problems. I think I'm just going to stop typing now.