As the Sarah Turns

Are you really keeping an eye on me with your binoculars Trevor? ....... Yeah, I think I'm still at a square one with you and David, and now much lesser with David. I think you could be just as much as a womanizer as David, but I just don't know you enough Trevor. Some things I just won't know until I do. .... I saw that "Aloha" movie today. I'm sorry if there was a time you could have gotten carried away with me in believing in some kind of made up relationship. I know a different way Aloha could be taken when I was at Virginia Beach..... Anyhoo, I'm still not sure what to think of you. According to some people you don't have a good reputation. I'm still looking at you specifically with rose colored glasses. I am not into Brandon B. and could never see myself with him. He's not my type at all. Bradly Cooper has left a little bit of a juggernaut and fascist impression on me. You really seem to be something other than them. You seem to have a more sincere sexual attraction to me. (I never cared for Brandon's sexual attraction). If you are like the rest of the totalitarian rapist losers, I have been long fed up with them. I'm sick of their gang raping vanity and the way they live to threaten me. Why do some men even care or try to put up a front with me anymore when they know they don't care and are still the same vain wolf? Why won't some men understand the soon to be giveaway they are? Why do they think they win in their childish lies when they know they lose when their identity is discovered? It is so childish to intentionally pursue in their Tom Foolery. They have never had point to prove knowing they won't win in the end. I'm sick of their vain gang rape and THE REAL PEST THEY ARE. Trevor, you haven't strongly convinced me of anything enough. I guess if there were anything I could say don't waste your or my time if you know you are the same vain gang raping wolf the others are.

Is this a clumsy scene?

I remember the local farmer man character and the nightmare that I had that I still don't know how to explain. I cried, we kind of fell for each other and then everything disappeared. He looked like he was into someone else and left a bad and abandoned impression on me really. I guess with you David, I feel frustrated with the arbitrage and credibility issue. Do you give yourself the full credit of the farmer man? Or, are you wanting to pimp me back into the farmer man? Even when it comes to the wealthy, I can't stand the way they want to give themselves any or whatever name they want when they want. When I don't see the story or the story in you, I just don't. I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT IN YOU. If it was, you're just another man on the list who has betrayed me too and cheaply wants to get me back. You're the one who is fucking it up for yourself now. I wasn't out to break your heart with Steve or even with Trevor. If we already have some kind of story, you're going to have to accept that it was done behind my back and I really don't know what was said or what went on with you. The lists of "personal stories" THAT NEVER WERE because people talk way too much and too unfairly and give themselves their own bullshit credit. There is fun and games and playing, and then THERE IS BEING A SERIOUSLY CORRUPT AND UNFAIR PIG. What murderous intent do you have to say to my face? Were you out to make the biggest lesbian out of me because I wasn't ever going to cave into chauvinism and suck it? Are you out to rip on my body or keep me sexually threatened? What betrayer are you and just how easy do you think I am? This is what you get for making me wonder the way you make me wonder.

Trevor, Military Man from Morgantown

I'm pretty sure you told me your name was Trevor. We talked about travel and survival man when I was working at After12 and a creepy Justin look alike was with you. I see you everywhere in the arbitrage. I know I don't really know what is going on with you but I see you everywhere. I see your red flags too. What can I say off of a few things? You have some of my interest and look like you are very interested in me too..... Someone or yourself is calling you "Jim" right now. It isn't good to be called Jim. There is a specific Jim who made himself on my bad side for life. To me, you personally haven't come across as a Jim that I can see. You have come across as a player playing a dangerous game who looks like he is into me. I don't know how you found me out and I don't know how intentional of a man you are to play me with my enemies. I really don't have any expectation of you. I think I look like I am quiet and soft to you and see myself as that and I have no explanation of my quietness and softness. I am mostly interested in David right now and plan on continuing to let the ball roll with him. I don't intentionally set myself up as a player and am not presently out to mean harm with anyone. You know you are a player. I question how much of a player David is. I am single and my sights are mostly focused on David right now. I guess I am repeating a lot of facts back to you but have some kind of feedback. I didn't like the way I felt like I was leaving you in the cold too much, but that is all there really is to say right now on my end. I'm not sure what is down the road a month or several months from now. I live each day as it comes with my own ambitions.